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I haven't checked my mail in 3 years but hey, give it a shot.



As promised last week, here's a monkey. A Mr T sock puppet monkey!


Sucker punch

A lot has been said and heard about Zack Snyder. Personally I believe the man's insane and only pulled out of his padded cell to make movies that make absurd amounts of money and make audiences doubt the very substance of the universe.

Sucker Punch is perhaps the most deranged movie in recent history. The trailer suggested pretty much everything cool we ever imagined all rolled into one picture. Zombie germans? Oh yes. Blimp attack? Indeed. Huge samurai robots? Hell yes! Also, this:

How can so much pure undiluted awesome be put in a single movie without throwing overboard every last ounce of reason? Well, as it turns out it can't. Sucker punch is a movie that actually requires some thinking because if you don't, it doesn't make any sense at all. Your brain will start hurting. Mine still hasn't fully recovered, although that may be because of the alcohol.

So, what could the story possibly be? Well, its not that merry. Babydoll (she doesn't get a real name) is locked in a mental institution by her evil step dad after the bastard murdered her sister. There, she imagines a world where she's not a health patient but a exotic dancer trapped in a brothel. Figuring that that's not much of an improvement she fills the gaps in this fantasy withan altogether more insane kind of fantasy. The violent kind. These fantasies.... ah forget it. here, have some screenshots. They'll explain much better then any words.

You've already seen these images in the trailer of course but believe me when I say that NOTHING will prepare you for the seemingly out of context awesomeness of huge samurai warriors opening fire with rocket launchers and mini guns. There seems to be no point behind it all. Yet, there is.

Babydoll is a deeply disturbed girl and she fills the pain with crazy fantasies. Then, in order to maintain sanity in that fantasy world she delves even more deeply into her own insanity. Its only until the very end of the movie that we can piece together what the fuck has actually happened in the 5 days that's she's been in the mental institution before she's sceduled to get a lobotomy. (this movie is apparently set in the 30's even though there are plenty of WW2, Vietnam and even contemporary weapons on screen all the time). Seeing as we're delving into the mind of a very deranged girl, this movie actually gets a lot of depth to it.

And dogfighting a dragon.

Of all the WW2 bomber dogfights with a dragon I have seen so far I have to say this is my favourite. Part becuase the plane doesn't get crushed in 2 seconds and part becuase the dragon looks like Deathwing and part because dragons are awesome.

The fantasies within her brothel fantasies are the most visually awesome parts. They serve as Babydoll's metaphor for getting into the mood to dance exotically for old men and she does this apparently really well although we never get to see it. Her dreams then become so insane that nothing makes sense to the audience. WW2 bomber fighting a dragon while orcs storm a castle and the girls have to kill the dragon's spawn while wielding modern day machine guns. It makes no sense. Just like a real dream. And yet, it's so very very awesome.

I barely know how to review this movie any further because it seems to dodge genre descriptions altogether and just goes wherever the fuck it wants to go. I could say that this is one of the best movies I've seen this past year. I could say its also one of the prettiest. I could say its voyouristic becuase of all the barely dressed woman in it. I could say its utterly derailed because of all the seemingly random violence. I could also say there's an intense sad layer in it and that it explores human cruelty and compassion in ways we've never seen in a movie.

In short, its one hell of a ride.








And remember:

"If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything. "

Crazy commissar dude



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