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My Greatest ever World of Warcraft moment.

This is the tale of my greatest ever World of Warcraft experience. It will perhaps force a smile from you and perhaps it will bring you to calling me the stupidest person ever, depending on your level of immersion in WoW. Either way. I don't really care.

So there I was behind my computer, happily engaged in my favorite way of computer use, watching the 4th season of House which was kindly provided for me by the greatest person in the world, shown below still having a lot of hair but caught in what might be the worst possible photo pose in human history:

Finally, a use for this picture!

And then suddenly, I received a phone call on my mobile. Now, before I go further I have to make an important point. I don't let anything disturb my House experience. When its on TV I'm not picking up the phone, I don't respond to questions. I enter a state of catatonia that only ends with the credits. Nobody disturbs me while I watch House.

However, I was watching it on my computer with DivX so I could pause it. I grunted, sighed, tried to ignore the painfully whistling ring tone and threw the phone across the room before, reluctantly, picking up, hoping that whoever it was would go away and die.

He didn't. It was someone who I had played with frequently and who had obtained my phone number by doing obscene things with my sister. Lets call him Londrandir. I knew what he was going to ask before I heard it, as there are very few reasons this person would ever call me (probably something to do with the consistent level of rudeness I try to maintain).

Anyway, Londrandir invited me for a raid to Karazhan. They needed one more member and they were set to go. That member could be me.

Now, Karazhan is a very interesting dungeon in World of warcraft and I'd never been there for a variety of reasons. First, I'm by far one of the more incompetent players you'll ever meet and so I don't try very hard. Second, doing Karazhan is a lot of work and work takes time. Time I don't really have. Third, doing raid dungeons means you have to put up with very annoying players. People who actually expect you to do stuff in a very specific order and I normally lose interest in about 2 hours. That is why I had already made a new character and made a sport out of it to pile the dead corpses I left to look like giant triangles.

For those who know Warhammer, they actually form the sign of Nurgle.

I doubted for a few moments but figured I could resume House after the raid, which would probably fail anyway. So, I logged on and appeared in the town of Telredor, where I had apparently left my character. I was promptly invited by some dude who I assumed was the raid leader.

Then, after about 4 seconds I was kicked from the group. Nothing had been said, nothing had been done. I was simply removed from the group with no explanation.

My annoyance grew as I sent a message to Londrandir, asking what was going on. He said the raid leader was making issues and the raid apparently already had a Hunter character.

I waited for a few minutes, while there was pointless arguing. For a little while it was sufficient to make my character stare at the crotch of a particularly white and shining Draenei female.

Not the worst place to spend a few minutes.

Eventually though, I got bored and told Londrandir I was going. I was annoyed, nothing more. I wanted to get back to House and forget this little incident. I logged out and tuned back to House, carefully looking up the point where I had left off. I had 2 episodes down and 10 more to go so I was in for a long stay. It was a good episodes too.

Then, it happened.

I got a second phone call. It was my sister who had been playing in the same raid I had been invited too. She said that the raid leader was ready to accept me back. I was welcome to come.

I said no. I had turned back to House and a second interruption would break the finely crafted balance in time and space. No way in this material universe or the next would I interrupt an episode of House a second time. Not going to happen. Never ever ever. That's pretty much what I said. She sounded disappointed and hung up.

Fine. Back to House. It was a good episode too, with interns washing his car so he might hire them. Brilliant stuff.

The phone rang again! I was close to using my most creative profanities as I picked up. It was a friend of mine who was apparently also in the same damn raid. There had been arguing and searching and other stuff going on and they had noone else to enter in the raid. Would I consider coming back?

My annoyance turned to a distinct feeling of awesomeness. A raid of 9 people had nobody else to ask and desperately wanted me to come back and play with them. They needed me. I was being needed. 9 people needed me.

I said no.

Actually, that's not what I said. I first called their raid leader the dumbest person I'd ever come across for not having an alternative player ready, laughed for about 2 minutes, called the raid leader some other silly names hoping to adequately capture his level of incompetence and laughed some more. It was an ego trip of ridiculous proportions, far exceeding any reason for it. Far exceeding any reason I could possibly ever get for a maniacal ego trip, but still there it was. I played World of warcraft for this reason, to laugh at stupid people. It was testosterone fed heaven. 


Then, I turned back to House and had an awesome evening.

WoW sucks anyway.


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